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Author Topic: When to intervene or just standby  (Read 1352 times)

Elking

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Re: When to intervene or just standby
« Reply #15 on: October 07, 2018, 09:40:19 AM »
reformulate that answer in a more civilized way please.

the moderator.
« Last Edit: October 07, 2018, 10:37:22 AM by The moderator »

streeteasy

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Re: When to intervene or just standby
« Reply #16 on: October 11, 2018, 11:59:03 AM »
The answer is Airbnb.

username

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Re: When to intervene or just standby
« Reply #17 on: October 11, 2018, 03:33:28 PM »
Don,t confront them....ever.
its not your job.
just go to front desk and complain...if desk does nothing , go to manager.
If manager does fuk all... check out!

PMIdump

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Re: When to intervene or just standby
« Reply #18 on: October 11, 2018, 05:11:39 PM »
Typically I don't bother anyone who doesn't bother me. If they are interfering with me or someone I feel cannot stand up for themselves because they are outnumbered or just unable then I would say something. If they are too over the top but not bothering anyone let them do what they want. If they are breaking bottles and damaging stuff then I would tell the manager and its their problem because they have to clean up and replace whatever is broken.

WanderingMan

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Re: When to intervene or just standby
« Reply #19 on: October 15, 2018, 10:41:39 AM »
My biggest problem is that a group of guys here are just going overboard with stupid shit. Being loud, slamming doors, just being obnoxious. Has any of you guys encountered this and if so how did you handle it?
People learn to be obnoxious when young. When young children under 18 perform those types of behaviors, the DSM 5 calls it oppositional defiant behavior. As an adult the behavior gets grouped with what they call narcissistic behaviors. A few weeks ago a letter Justice Kavanaugh wrote when a late teen was released describing the exact behaviors you mention. In the letter he described premeditated intentional obnoxious behavior and disregard toward neighbors. At 19/20 those were clearly narcissistic behaviors.

The long and short of it is that an individual is unlikely to change personality traits after about the age of 5 without experiencing significant emotional event(s). That means when you approach someone exhibiting narcissistic behaviors he won't change them. Those individuals lack empathy or respect for others. It's the me, me, me crowd. It's the "what's in it for me?" group. You'd be wasting your breath on them.

If you want a change in the behavior then complaining to the management then provides the manager a reason to approach them. Then the manager can make it clear that what is in it for them is the ability to stay in the hotel and not suffer eviction. People who exhibit narcissistic behaviors typically push until they experience push back.

On the broader side, research from the National Institute for Health that evaluated over 37,000 individuals revealed that narcissistic behaviors are on the rise in today's society like obesity was 20 years ago. Narcissism is now considered an epidemic and some groups have statistically significantly higher rates than others.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2669224/

PapiViejo55-2

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Re: When to intervene or just standby
« Reply #20 on: October 15, 2018, 11:00:46 AM »
Did I just learn something?


...I'm usually wrong...but that sh!t was great!

Kubrick

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Re: When to intervene or just standby
« Reply #21 on: October 15, 2018, 12:34:13 PM »
I have had that problem both in the DR and travelling in general. I go to the front desk and explain politely and calmly before I get too annoyed with the situation. Confronting a group can backfire easily. I also look at it like this: I am not there to do the work of managing the hotel. Even groups of true idiots usually get the idea the first time they are told if only because they know the next step is the police arriving. But,in the end, you have to be prepared to move out if the hotel staff doesn't get results.

bachatero

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Re: When to intervene or just standby
« Reply #22 on: October 15, 2018, 04:20:45 PM »
I had this happen to me on my first trip to Sosua about 9 years ago.  Damn I loved the old Sosua with Passions and CMP.

I went to Sosua on a mission to see if this was a town we wanted to go to for our annual golf vacation.  I stayed at one of the cheapest hotels there...Sea Breeze.  It was a decent hotel, but it was one of the cheapest I found...and you know the saying, you get what you pay for.

So I get there and one afternoon I needed to make a few phone calls.  The brothas were playing the music loud and were having a pool party.  One white guy already went out and complained...like Blacknight said...it did not go well.  He basically was told to F off and the party continued.

Now why did he get dissed like that???  The real answer was not because he was white, but because of the way he asked.  He was kind of rude and out of line.  But of course that is my opinion.

A few hours later I after the white guy was basically told to go F off, I needed to make a few phone calls.  I simply went over to them, introduced myself, shook their hands, and then told them that I had to work for an hour or so.  I asked politely if they could turn down the music so that I could make the phone calls.  They said no problem bro...let us know when and we will turn the music down.

I personally don't think the African Americans will be turned off if a white guy approaches them properly.  In fact I think that it is the white guys that try to act gangster and will be the biggest assholes if you approach them.  The stupidest people I've seen in Sosua have not ben African Americans, but instead the wanna-be gangsta white boys. smh  Thank God only a few venture to Sosua.
Live free or die!

danceelite0

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Re: When to intervene or just standby
« Reply #23 on: October 15, 2018, 07:26:20 PM »
While I am on vacation I mind my own business.  The only time I’ll even consider raining on someone’s parade is if they are physically hurting someone else unfairly male or female.  Noise, music, loud talking not my problem, nor my buisness.  I sometimes stay at new garden it can get pretty rowdy usually first floor balcony parties and the breakfast convo about conquest the night before.  I am older guy not prudish at all but I am usually pretty chill.

username

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Re: When to intervene or just standby
« Reply #24 on: October 15, 2018, 08:10:25 PM »
I love "get backs"
I also always TIP the hotel help well , from bell hop / front desk / claening maids.
If some dickheads  were dickheads..slip the gardener 10 bucks and get him to cut the lawn and then use leaf blower at 8 am.
right out front of dickheads room!
play some early morning exercise music very loud and yell..."one-two-three- and four " over and over.

WanderingMan

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Re: When to intervene or just standby
« Reply #25 on: October 16, 2018, 12:09:30 AM »
I love "get backs"
I also always TIP the hotel help well , from bell hop / front desk / claening maids.
If some dickheads  were dickheads..slip the gardener 10 bucks and get him to cut the lawn and then use leaf blower at 8 am.
right out front of dickheads room!
play some early morning exercise music very loud and yell..."one-two-three- and four " over and over.
Back in the DSM-3 days, we called this type of behavior "passive aggressive."

 


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